Sprout's Birthday

Wednesday, June 13th.

I woke up at 7am and laid in bed for longer than I should have. I was tired, and just not feeling motivation to get moving. I eventually got up and suddenly we were running late. Oops. Nerves hit me and I had to get sick a few times. My husband then asked how I was doing, and I began crying. I wasn't sad, just very overwhelmed. On the way to the hospital, hubby began talking about other things and at one point I said something and he said he was trying to keep my mind off of things. :)

We got to the hospital, checked in, and went upstairs to the surgery check in. Sprout's dads stayed in the waiting room with Tom, and I got taken back to get prepped. Lots of doctors and nurses. Tons. Everyone was really positive.. except my OB. I did my best at ignoring her, "This could go bad" talk as I was just tired of hearing it already. Eventually Tom was brought back to sit with me for awhile. The nurses were all horrified to hear that no one was going into the OR with me. I explained why, but then the anesthesiologist and OB came in and said Tom could go in with me. *sigh* Really? After you both just nearly pleaded with me last week to not have anyone in with me? Tom and I talked briefly, but we decided he'd stay out. I know he would have went in a second had I asked him, but overall I felt it best for me and him for him to stay out.

And then the OB and anesthesiologist said they wanted me to stay awake for the entire thing. Here I was prepping myself for the idea of general anesthesia, and they had changed their minds. I was a bit irritated. I am such a planner, that someone changing something I had planned on just grates on my nerves. I was also terrified that I'd begin freaking out on the table, in which case they'd put me out anyway!

I got my epidural, instead of the spinal (spinal only lasts 3 hours, they wanted something that would last longer). Arching your back like a cat with a HUGE belly in front of you is not easy. And then a nurse is reaching up underneath of your gown to track baby on the monitor and make sure his heart sounds okay. LOL. But I got the epidural and then a central line along with two IVs. I was taken back to the OR rather quickly, and they began prepping me more - getting yet another IV in me, making sure the donor blood they had was correct, etc.

The doctor came in to do the stents in my ureters. Between this, the IVs (my veins were being a pain), a quick xray to verify something or another, etc.? It was overwhelming. The anesthesiologist began dosing my epidural and the shakes started. I've never shook so bad during a c-section. It was horrible. I had a nurse on either side holding my hands, as my arms were practically jumping off of the table (seriously). I had tears pouring out of my eyes continuously, and they thought something was wrong, but that's just what I do when I'm shaking!

It took an hour and a half in the OR of prepping before they got down to business. They did the section and I quickly heard Sprout being pulled out, suctioned a tiny bit and then he screamed. I was hoping to get to see him but no such luck. They took him over to wrap him up and got him out of there within two minutes it seemed like. I was then told my hysterectomy was beginning. Ugh, I wish they'd just put me under, but I was shaking so hard I couldn't ask for that when I thought of it. The anesthesiologist began giving me meds to relax me and that helped the shaking for about five minutes before it returned worse than ever. Dang it.

I tried my best not to listen to the doctors doing the hysterectomy. At one point I heard how much blood I was losing, and I remember wondering how much more I could lose before... I don't know? I then began ignoring them more so, to the best of my ability anyway. Nurses and anesthesiologist were great, they were asking me continuously if I was okay. I was so hoped up on whatever meds I'd been given, I could barely talk. When I could talk, I was slurring my words, and I just got frustrated and gave up replying to them. I'd instead shake my head yes or no when they'd ask and leave it at that.

I fell asleep a few times during the hysterectomy, which was SO nice. I believe the surgery went from 10am to just after 2pm? I was in recovery then for just over an hour before being taken to my room. I was so anxious to see the baby and the daddies, but the nurses were doing other things, which I understood. Finally they got the guys and baby brought into the room, and then my husband.

The rest of the day was quite a blur. From 4 to 7 pm I was in a lot of pain around my incision site. I was asking the nurse to give me a different med, as the med in the pump wasn't working. She upped the dose, and I requested she not and just give up (I was that sure it wasn't working, I was that frustrated and in pain), but she kept telling me to hit the button every 15 minutes. Well, I was, but the pain was getting worse. I was so frustrated, trying not to cry, I was shaking at one point and twitching my feet to take my mind off of it somewhat. I found myself doing deep breaths, and eventually the nurse asked something about pain (I think the scale of 1-10, to which I said 9, and I began crying and trying to suppress my desire to moan through the pain).

The nurse couldn't figure it out, finally said she'd ask my OB to approve Ibuprofen or Tylenol. But the doctors were busy, as I was told, which only frustrated me (I am not a good person to be around when I'm in pain). Then Tylenol was approved, but the nurse forgot to bring it. In the end, another nurse came in and checked out the medication pump to find out the pump wasn't working. It was supposed to be beeping each time I hit the button, but I didn't know that. Well, it wasn't beeping. So three hours with no meds. Never want to do that again, no thanks. My poor husband was even trying to emphasize to them that I am the type who only needs Ibuprofen for 2-3 days after a section, so something was obviously not good this time. Ah well. They figured it out, and I was so thankful for that second nurse. :)

I did end up losing my uterus and cervix. The OB didn't elaborate (yet), but said there was no way around it once they were in there, I guess. The plus to this? They didn't have to knead my belly (uterus) post-op, so I didn't have to deal with that pain and irritation. I was trying to find the positives in this yesterday, can you tell?

I lost just over 2.5 liters of blood, so I had 3 transfusions. My bladder had scar tissue on it, so they removed the scarring as much as they could, but then had to repair the bladder which created a weak spot that had to be further repaired. I have to have a catheter for 7 days in order for my bladder to heal properly. Things went well for the most part, and thankfully I was not given morphine (I'm apparently allergic, as we've found out the previous two sections). So while I'm somewhat itchy, I'm not excessively itchy!

Sprout is doing well. He's a bit sleepy, which everyone attributes to him being a 37 weeker (it may be "term" but it's not 39/40+ weeks either). I've gotten him to latch a few times with a lot of work, but otherwise I am pumping to keep that stimulation going.

Most of the staff here has been wonderful, which is different than my previous two surrogacys. They even gave Sprout's daddies their own room across the hall, which I found to be wonderful. The lactation consultant has been great, she was so happy I had colostrum for Sprout (for the time in which I was still in surgery). She was so nice to the guys, and then she came in to help me to get Sprout to latch. (Moving around to get comfy plus latch a baby isn't so easy with an incision in the middle of your belly) She was so nice, I just couldn't get over it! The other really wonderful one was the baby nurse that was with me during prep, the surgery and then met with the guys and helped them with the baby, I believe. She is a total sweetheart. She made sure to remember the guys names, which was funny, because she kept repeating their names to herself, even during the surgery - which made me laugh.

The nurse that found my medication pump not working was also to be my night nurse. She is a complete sweetheart as well, so very helpful. I hate asking for help, HATE IT, but she offered to make my tea for me during the night. :) She's been great about taking the baby back and forth between my room and the guys room (though one intended daddy was coming in here as well, we're not totally dependent on the poor nurse, lol). The night nurse also told me I had two incisions, which no one had told me. I'm still unsure as to why, but there's the main incision which is obvious, but then a second incision. I'm curious to hear about that today from the doctor!

Overall, the birth went better than I had expected. I am feeling pretty weak from the blood loss. My left leg is also not wanting to work, so they are trying to figure out why. I tried to stand this morning, and did to an extent, but walking is out of the question. My left leg, while I can feel it, feels as though it weighs 50 lbs alone. It's like when you're leg is asleep and you can't feel it moving as you're trying to walk along before it wakes up, but it's a bit worse. I'm not too worried, just hoping it was due to the epi and will improve soon.

I'm feeling blessed this morning. I only had two hours of sleep, and one of my poor nipples is a bit ouchie from a poor latch (I knew I should have corrected it, oops). But I can't complain, the day was great, and seeing those two men with their baby boy is a-flipping-mazing. And that little boy, well I am bias, but I think he's adorable.

Oh, his stats - he was born at 11:53am, weighing in at 8 lbs 1 oz (at 37 weeks, woo hoo!), 20.5" long, 15" head. He has dark brown hair as well. I think he looks so tiny, and my husband agreed, though obviously we're used to our big kiddos at home. :) Everyone keeps saying how big Sprout is. I was sure he'd be in the 7 lb range, but I was wrong. :)

So, Happy Birthday to Sprout. I am thrilled to end my surrogacy days with this pregnancy and birth, even though it wasn't ideal at times, it worked out and I'm glad.